Benjamin, 30

'A Good Dude'

“Nathan, he’s a good friend of mine [who I met doing street Tai Chi]. We’ve known each other, I think, going on about nine years. Back then, I didn’t really talk much. I was kind of like teaching myself and minding my own business. I was walking around, talking to myself, and one guy says, ‘Hey, Benjamin, have you ever tried talking to anyone?’ I was like, ‘Why?’ He’s like, ‘because I’ve listened to what you’re saying, and it makes a whole lot of sense.’ So, after that, I kind of started opening up, you know, started talking and making more friends and talking to more people. But, Nathan, yeah, he’s a good dude. We clicked, yeah. We started hanging out. I mean, we’re very straight forward – we don’t bullshit. I think it was just that we have a lot in common, a lot of similarities, same personality kind of thing.

He’s been up at the hospital a couple of times, and I go to visit him, keep an eye on him, make sure he’s still doing good. He’s, like, 38. So, he’s a couple years older. But, yeah, we have a lot in common. We talk about a lot of similar things. He talks about things I don’t even know about. I mean, it’s, you know, both ways. You learn from each other. Yeah. He understands what I’ve been through. He understands. You know, he helps me out with how to deal with things and perspectives and kind of turns my mentality around, you know, makes me focus. I mean, we’re always at each other’s neck, you know, bickering and fighting. Sometimes we get pissed off at each other. Sometimes it goes too far. But I think he’s a really good friend.

I’ve been in a relationship class, and there’s these certain categories – like best friends, close friends, you know, certain categories. And I came up to Nathan, like, you know what, what category friend we fall under? So, we’re still good. Okay, close. We’re good friends. I mean, for me, it’s that I’ve always moved around, even in Salt Lake, this place and that place. So, it’s hard to kind of connect with people. It’s hard to relate to people, the people who don’t judge you, people who see who you are. And I think, for me, I think now as I’m getting older, a little more mature, it’s easier to make friends. I used to, you know, keep people at a distance and push people away. So, I think having friends in my life, it’s changed me.”

Photograph and story documented by Stephen Speckman.